Trying To Stay Calm

I’m not going to write about being dark in a grown-up world today. Instead, I’ll try to write about staying sane in said grown-up world a reality which leaves not much room for thinking about how to regoth your wardrobe, for reading a good book or going to a festival – because one is tired, angry, and trying to keep one’s calm.

As I’ve mentioned before, several changes are going on in “The K. Family’s Life”. Last December, both Mr. K. and I both applied for new jobs. We were both accepted. Which is fantastic!

We had already started looking for a new place to call home by then but with the new jobs our plans needed to change. In May, we decided not to be renters anymore but to buy a three-bedroom appartment in a city we both like and which lies right in the middle between those two cities in which we are now going to work.

Sounds great so far, doesn’t it? But this is were reality strikes…

Buying an appartment isn’t what I expected it to be. It takes an awfully looong time to get everything in order. Appointments need to be made with the realtor, the sellers, the bank, the solicitor. Information needs to be gathered. Forms have to be filled out, documents need to be copied and sent away… This is so exhausting! Because it takes so long. It’s not done in a couple of days – because you depend on so many different people to do their part.

We’ve been trying to get hold of our clerical assistant at the bank for days. He never once called back. Today, I learned from a different clerk that the first one had forgotten about us. As simple as that. He didn’t fill out and send the documents we need. He just forgot about it. Completely. And didn’t call back when he realized it.

Now, what do you tell everybody else about that? Everybody is waiting for us to sign the sales agreement. And we’re just so angry!

I haven’t slept well for days because of that. Additionally, I’m a little scared about what might await me in the new department. Only two more weeks until I start working in a different field, in a different city, with co-workers I don’t know yet.

I feel overwhelmed sometimes.

Still, I’m looking forward to these changes. The new job offers so many great possibilities and the new appartment is huge and will offer plenty of space for the three of us (dog included). Also, I just love arranging furniture and decorating rooms. But it’s still such a long way until we get there.

Have you ever experienced something like this? Circumstances which seemed to drain all your energy? Situations which left you so exhausted you didn’t even want to do fun things anymore?

I try to be patient, stay calm, and see the positive sides of the whole thing. I turned angry on the phone only once. Yet.😉


  1. woah.. that is just.. rude! I mean, we are all humans and stuff like that can happen, but not even call when you realize your mistake? what a jerk!
    I hope everything will be sorted out soon and you’ll get a little more sleep.


    1. Well, I’ve heard that he won’t be working much longer at that bank… Go figure!😉 *lol*
      His above-mentioned co-worker told me…

      Thanks, Trisha. I hope so, too, because I so want to get started moving in!

  2. Oh I can SO totally relate! We bought our house almost two years ago, and it was THE most stressful time of my life. As ridiculous as the paperwork was, the search process was so much more ridiculous that the paperwork was the EASY part!!! Every house we looked at had a “cash buyer” (aka investor) snapping it up before we could get an offer in. We tried 17 times before we finally got one! Yep, SEVENTEEN homes, sixteen of which were snatched up by wealthy investors. It was heartbreaking and infuriating and an extremely emotional time for me. It consumed me for the three months we were going through it. I had one total breakdown/sobbing bout at work even, after yet another “bad news” call from the realtor, because it felt like we would never get anything without having $200,000 in cash! In the end, it worked out wonderfully for us and I wouldn’t trade the home we got for any of the other 16 we tried for. But I hope to NEVER have to buy a house again!

    Hang in there. I don’t mean to make it sound like it’s going to be an awful process; I’m just saying that you will get through it and you’ll love your new home once the business part is behind you! I guess everyone has to pay their dues before becoming a homeowner – I’ve never heard of it being a smooth process, but it always works out in the end. Stay focused on the positive things ahead, and know that you WILL survive this.

    Sorry for the long comment! 🙂 I’ve been chatty lately. lol!

    1. I LOVE long comments!🙂

      Thank you for the encouragement. I needed that today.

      Seventeen!? That really sounds awful. How discouraging it must have been to have houses sbatched up right before your eyes.

      We looked at several places, too. Some were horrible (do sellers really expect people do buy crap like that?). Some seemed to be cheap and then we learned that you had to invest additional 50,000 € for a new heating system, insulation, new windows,…

      The place we are “trying” to buy was build in 1955 and isn’t very pretty from the
      outside. But it’s a large appartment and already mostly renovated. The kitchen is brand new and very modern. There’s enough rooms for a home office and a child’s room (some time in the future, hopefully). The bathrooms (one regular bathroom, one smaller with only a toilet and a wash basin) have old-fashioned tiles in them but maybe I can paint those white… I’ve read it’s possible to paint bathroom tiles.

  3. That sounds sooo frustrating. I would have totally lost my cool. But once it’s done, it’ll be yours.

    I’m personally of the mind that people are insane lately. The DH and I have to drive back to another town because apparently the dentist DH went to overcharged us by $100 and has to refund us. (big deal when we both are unemployed right now) This is after quoting us wrong prices for the first two visits. Needless to say we’ve changed dentists.

  4. Oh my yes, it seems like every exciting major life transition is accompanied by “Circumstances which seemed to drain all your energy”. Three weeks before I started grad school I discovered that the financial aid office simply had not received any of my application materials (which were sent in on time two months previously) because of some weird paperwork thing that was mentioned nowhere in all my instructions on applying for aid. I would simply owe the school $20,000 in three weeks or be kicked out. Needless to say we worked it out because I am in school and have probably never had even a tenth of that amount of money at one time, but not before I had a major, ugly meltdown or two. I think all things considered it sounds like you are handling everything very well.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s